Parents want the best for their children and will often put their children’s needs above everything else and as such, can mistakenly fall into the trap of thinking that they should prioritize their children over their marriage. However, when they do, they unintentionally neglect their own relationship. Over time, this will lead to a gradual drift between husband and wife. As the years pass, and the focus remains solely on the children, the couple grows further and further apart, each becoming more of their own person with their own lives, rather than growing together.
When the children eventually grow up and leave the home, many couples find themselves facing a startling reality—they no longer know the other person. The focus was always on the children, not on themselves, and they find they both have grown apart and no longer seem to have much in common anymore. What kept them together is no longer there and they feel disconnected and unsure of where to go from there.
On the other hand, couples that prioritize their marriage, invest in their future together. They make time to be with each other. They regularly go on dates and share their new thoughts, goals and hobbies with each other. In this way, they nurture their bond and grow closer over the years. This strong, loving relationship not only benefits the couple but also creates a calm, secure, and loving atmosphere for their children. When children grow up in a home where their parents are united and supportive of each other, they feel more secure, tend to act out less and are more emotionally stable. They thrive in the knowledge that their family is built on a solid foundation of love and respect, which is something they will take with them in their life.
As the children grow and eventually move out, a couple that has prioritized their marriage finds themselves deeply connected. They have shared not just children, but they have shared their life together. They have built memories and cultivated a love that has matured and deepened over time. When the house is quieter and the focus shifts away from raising children, these couples have a strong relationship to rely on, full of shared experiences, mutual respect, and enduring love.
Putting your marriage first doesn’t mean neglecting your children. It means that you understand that your relationship with your spouse is the very heart of the family. When the heart is strong and healthy, it creates a nurturing environment for the children. And when the day comes that the children have moved on to start their own lives, you both remain united, ready to enjoy the next chapter together.
💖Rivkah